Cafe Chat Discussion

  • Ralphy
    Ralphy
    Posted on:
    30th Nov 2010 02:44pm

    Last Post 7th Jun 2012
    Replies     30

    Love or lust?

    Here is my question. What is better ???? LOVE or LUST.
    From experience my opinion would be that although love is grand when you are in love with someone, the problem is it tends to end and end bad. Where lust is pure physical attraction... you don't have to worry about if they snore or if they leave their socks on the floor or don't put down the toilet seat, it is pure physical attraction that may last one night or one month but never ever becomes anything serious and you never get the chance to be bored of each other...
    Love is being able to sit in the same room as someon and there not be awkward silences.. no need to try and fill in the gaps, knowing each other very well, knowing that when you come home he or she is there waiting for you and will be happy to see you..

    Both have there ups and downs, I'm just curious to see who would choose one over the other and why....

  • GK
    GK
    Posted on:
    3rd Dec 2010 09:29pm

    GK says: I go for Love. While lust is fantastic knock your socks off fun it can turn ugly pretty quick. I spent my years from 16 to 30 in lust with lots of people. Only three had any mutual Love attatched, several had one sided love. Mainly you end up feeling like people only want you for your body and not the "Real You" and that can end up being pretty shallow and lonely.

  • Ralphy
    Ralphy
    Posted on:
    8th Dec 2010 12:05pm

    GK says: I go for Love. While lust is fantastic knock your socks off fun it can turn ugly pretty quick. I spent my years from 16 to 30 in lust with lots of people. Only three had any mutual Love attatched,...

    Ralphy says: You know, there is nothing wrong with a bit of each. I think the true winning way is to be in love but not to let go of the lust side with your partner.... If you can keep that side of it strong it would and should only make your love even stronger. Then there would be no need to be going out looking for it elsewhere.... Like you when I was younger and single, I went out with no intent of getting into as relationship.. I used and was used in return but it was a mutual thing so no one got hurt, now as Im getting older....... mind you an open relationship with someone of similar tastes and desires could be a good thing too as it would allow you to have both... nothing like wanting your cake and eating it too lol

  • kay
    kay
    Posted on:
    18th Dec 2010 11:46am

    Ralphy says: You know, there is nothing wrong with a bit of each. I think the true winning way is to be in love but not to let go of the lust side with your partner.... If you can keep that side of it strong it...

    kay says: dear Ralph it seems there are a lot with this attitude these days...i dont think its so good. a real relationship is a great friendship; a soul mate unconditional love; fun; sharing and enjoying each other in every way and growing spiritually together...i know sounds corny to some but ive been through the wringer with guys and there are some out there that feel the same as i do...and so many that just want a screw...wheres your need for enlightenment....get ur head out of ur pants and grow up.

  • kay
    kay
    Posted on:
    18th Dec 2010 11:35am

    GK says: I go for Love. While lust is fantastic knock your socks off fun it can turn ugly pretty quick. I spent my years from 16 to 30 in lust with lots of people. Only three had any mutual Love attatched,...

    kay says: hi guys yes i prefer to be in love as feeling used is horrible and im looking for that passion now ... where are u my love.

  • suziq
    suziq
    Posted on:
    27th Dec 2010 11:18pm

    GK says: I go for Love. While lust is fantastic knock your socks off fun it can turn ugly pretty quick. I spent my years from 16 to 30 in lust with lots of people. Only three had any mutual Love attatched,...

    suziq says: I go for Love it lasts a lot longer but lust is good to especially when your young but Love wins hands down for me.
    yes lust can be lonley at times.

  • padke
    padke
    Posted on:
    14th Feb 2012 08:03pm

    GK says: I go for Love. While lust is fantastic knock your socks off fun it can turn ugly pretty quick. I spent my years from 16 to 30 in lust with lots of people. Only three had any mutual Love attatched,...

    padke says: Love is forever ....lust is just for the moment

  • stewart
    stewart
    Posted on:
    8th Dec 2010 11:52am

    stewart says: I found that even thou Love is grand the devorce cost me 64 grand. One can do both to spice up their love life.

  • j4
    j4
    Posted on:
    8th Dec 2010 10:16pm

    j4 says: It started off as LUST on both sides but turned in to LOVE. All went really good for 4 yrs then the wheels fell off.She went off her meds and when she came out of Hospital she went to live with her Daughter. She said that she did not want any thing to do with me ever again. 8 months later she came back. 2 years later the same thing happened again. When she came out of Hospital this time she went to live with her X. Then after I had started DIvorce proceedings (8 months) she turned up at the door and asked if she could come back. This time I said no. She went back to her daughter. The divorce cost me over $110,000.
    Never again. Now I would take LUST only.

  • bren
    bren
    Posted on:
    18th Dec 2010 08:04am

    bren says: I'd definitely choose love. OK, emotionally you can go from the highest highs to the lowest lows - but when you look into the eyes of the one you love, and you just melt like butter .... and make love while you are in that zone .... it beats lust any day!


  • Lani
    Lani
    Posted on:
    18th Dec 2010 11:11am

    Lani says: love. love. love. love! Lust alone is no comparison. Love comes with lust. And you can tell you've got a good one when the lust is still there, years and years later. My relationship of 4 years has been the most rewarding, enjoyable experience of my life. I wouldn't trade that in for 4 years worth of hook-ups. No way.

  • kay
    kay
    Posted on:
    18th Dec 2010 11:50am

    Lani says: love. love. love. love! Lust alone is no comparison. Love comes with lust. And you can tell you've got a good one when the lust is still there, years and years later. My relationship of 4 years has...

    kay says: u go girl ... love forever

  • passum
    passum
    Posted on:
    21st Dec 2010 07:59am

    kay says: u go girl ... love forever

    passum says: What we all should think about in any relationship love should be forever, not tempory. Where lust is a one night stand to be forgotton about. Nothing beets love sweet love I wonder who ever came up with that saying.

  • virgo
    virgo
    Posted on:
    1st Mar 2011 11:56am

    virgo says: love is better because it lasts a lifetime where lust is in the moment

  • virgo
    virgo
    Posted on:
    1st Mar 2011 12:00pm

    virgo says: love is better because it lasts a lifetime where lust is in the moment it is also good to be lustful towards your partener i still am after 25years of marrige

  • woodie
    woodie
    Posted on:
    12th Jan 2012 02:39pm

    virgo says: love is better because it lasts a lifetime where lust is in the moment it is also good to be lustful towards your partener i still am after 25years of marrige

    woodie says: I agree. I have been married to a great guy for over 26 years but sometimes a bit of lust would be nice. He looks at pictures of thin women in very little clothing and yet doesn't seem to look at me like that. Even though I'm disabled, I still have desires and often try for attention that rarely leads to results. The only time he shows interests is when he suddenly feels the mood. I know he works hard and is in a lot of pain but his actions have left me with a very low opinion of my body image. I'm not overweight but feel fat and ugly..In every other way, he is caring and thoughtful. I just wish he could see my needs at times.

  • gk
    gk
    Posted on:
    30th Dec 2011 01:53pm

    gk says: It al depends upon one's level of emotional and personal character maturity.

  • Lady Blue
    Lady Blue
    Posted on:
    3rd Mar 2012 11:11pm

    Lady Blue says: Love is better for the long haul and definitely Lust for the passion, because in my opinion Love loses the passion after awhile, but lust...

  • LastTimeLord
    LastTimeLord
    Posted on:
    5th Mar 2012 11:50am

    Lady Blue says: Love is better for the long haul and definitely Lust for the passion, because in my opinion Love loses the passion after awhile, but lust...

    LastTimeLord says: Hi Lady Blue

    I hope love never loses the passion and I can't believe that you can have love without lust!

  • Lady Blue
    Lady Blue
    Posted on:
    5th Mar 2012 07:04pm

    LastTimeLord says: Hi Lady Blue

    I hope love never loses the passion and I can't believe that you can have love without lust!

    Lady Blue says: Hi DalekLord, twenty odd years ago that would have been true, than Love meant something, unfortunately nowadays the Lust is more passionate if the encounter is spontaneous. Eh...my friends say i am cynical but i believe that because Life has become so busy and technical and i will say animated that Love is now a second factor rather then the other way around. Hot, sweaty passionate Lust is in and Love factors in later! And that's when it becomes boring, and same old.

  • LastTimeLord
    LastTimeLord
    Posted on:
    5th Mar 2012 09:23pm

    Lady Blue says: Hi DalekLord, twenty odd years ago that would have been true, than Love meant something, unfortunately nowadays the Lust is more passionate if the encounter is spontaneous. Eh...my friends say i am...

    LastTimeLord says: Hi Lady Blue

    I was around twenty (extremely) odd years ago and I find it interesting that 'spontaneous' is the new black. To quote Shakespeare
    "How weary, stale, flat and unprofitable
    Seem to me all the uses of this world?
    Fie on't, a fie!"
    -Hamlet, Act I, Scene ii, Lines 133-135
    Thanks for the reply

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